Anonymous murmured: 24/F So for a few months I've been spending time with this guy, we connected and I fell hard for him. Most people thought we were together.. and so did I. One night we got into it and the short story is all he wanted was a friend. Now months later he's confessed to loving me and was scared at the time.. and is now scared of losing me after a fight. He's a dear friend to me now.. I am not sure what to say to him now. Any Advice?
Be honest with him. Just because he realized he has feelings for you after all this time doesn’t mean you owe him anything. If he’s just a friend to you now, then you have to tell him that. He turned you away once, you’re allowed to do the same. Even if he hadn’t, you’re not obligated to reciprocate any romantic feelings.
However, if you feel like you’d want to be more than just friends, then that’s also great. So long as it’s something that would make you happy, not an effort to please him. If he can’t handle just being friends with you, you shouldn’t have to get into a relationship. That is not your issue. If he cares enough, he’ll stick around regardless of what your response is.
Take some time to think about what’s going through your head and when you’re absolutely sure of yourself, then talk to him. We have a tendency to go into situations like these without really understanding what we’re thinking because our emotions are clouding everything. Give it a couple weeks, give or take. That’s usually enough time to sort through things.
Good luck, darling. I hope everything goes well.